| 2x03-2x04 |
[25 Nov 2009|07:40pm] |
Elliot: HEY SAL!!! HOW'S IT GOING??
Margaret was actually still okay at this point. I guess it's Mona's fault for making her freak out about having a big wedding when she didn't want to.
but the best scene is when Peggy takes a picture of her family with Father Gill and Father Gill has a look on his face like "I HATE WOMEN."
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| oh, buddy |
[25 Nov 2009|05:15pm] |
this morning I was talking to my friend Ralph when I left to get a soda. When I returned to my computer Ralph had gone to bed (he lives in California). Before signing off, he'd written:
so two asperger things
8:54 AM 1. a guy in my program has it and everytime I talk to him I remember that and go "FUCK! I WANT TO HANG OUT WITH AMANDA"
2. DId you hear about the kid who ran away from home and spent a week living on the subway in NYC?
I had not heard! But I have now. The kid is named Francisco Hernandez Jr. and he lives in Brooklyn. He's 13 and was diagnosed with Asperger's three years ago. When he's under pressure, Francisco (in the words of the doctor who diagnosed him) "freezes in confusion because he does not know what to do or say." On October 15, he was yelled at for not completing an assignment, and the school called his mom. When Francisco called his mom to say he was coming home, his mom told him that she wanted to have a serious talk with him. He was so anxious that he got on the subway and continued to ride the subway for 11 days, using his bag as a pillow and using the ten dollars he had on him to buy junk food at subway stations.
His parents feel that the police didn't work hard enough to find Francisco because they are immigrants and didn't "understand how to manage the situation [or] speak English very well." A detective told his mom that Francisco was probably staying with a friend--but he doesn't have any friends. Francisco says he "stopped feeling anything" while he was riding the subway. When asked what he thinks about the fact that no one noticed him or talked to him for eleven days, he said, "Nobody really cares about the world and about people.”
This story is both the saddest and the coolest thing ever. Like many ASD people, I love trains, and living on a subway train is the kind of thing I made up stories about when I was a kid, writing up elaborate plans of how I'd survive. Francisco has accomplished a feat of E. L. Konigsburg proportions. There's also something iconic about the unselfconsciously gloomy statements he made to the New York Times--"nobody really cares about the world and about people"? I'm pretty sure he could become the next Edward Scissorhands or Jeff Mangum.
But while it's nice to imagine Francisco bragging about his adventure to his friends when he's 19 or 20, the time when this will be just an awesome story is a long way away. The time when Francisco will have friends is, probably, a long way away, and I bet it seems so far away that he doesn't believe it exists. He said he was planning on staying on the subway forever; he lost all sense of time. I think people lose their sense of time when they think that things are so bad they'll never change.
The words "eighth grade" are the two most painful words in the English language, at least for me. But I still believed in a better future, sort of; not with all my heart, but enough that I didn't try to disappear from life altogether. I held on. It breaks my heart that Francisco didn't believe there was anything to hold on for, that the world was just too scary for him to stay.
I want to write him a letter. I want this period of his life to be over. I want him to go the school where his doctors want him to go, where he can be with other kids who have disabilities, instead of staying at the school that claims he's doing fine but terrified him into disappearing for two weeks. I just want him to be older, playing video games with his friends and saying, "hey, did I ever tell you about the time I ran away and lived on the subway?"
(About the New York Times article: it was pretty good. I liked that they focused on Francisco's experience and didn't emphasize how difficult it was for his family. The picture is really weird though; why did they have to use a picture of him playing a video game and therefore looking (because you can't see the game) like he's staring into space? There must be a picture of him smiling at Christmas or something. I mean, I understand why they like to have pictures of people doing everyday things, but it just seems kind of othering to use a picture where he has an expression like that. )
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| 1x07 Red in the Face |
[21 Nov 2009|07:42pm] |
"Burning the midnight oil is not good for your skin."--Pete
"That would be super."--Peggy (ADORABLE)
I really liked S1 Margaret; I have no idea when or how she got so annoying.
Sally: My eyes are burning.
Betty: That's impossible.
Paul: What's a chip-and-dip?
Pete: Are you serious?
Ken: What is it?
Pete: What, do you have your fingers in your ears? It's a chip-and-dip.
I really want a chip-and-dip, I would smile whenever I looked at it.
Roger's story about how drunk he was is something I would totally do, and I don't drink. That's probably not a good thing.
Pete: It's a chip-and-dip. We got two. That's practically four of something. (creepy laugh)
hunting scene: I wish I could just listen to VK talk for the rest of my life. this is my favorite video:
I mean, it's not actually my favorite video, it's just a good example of a type of video of which every individual instance is my favorite video simultaneously with all the other ones. By which I mean: look how Vincent Kartheiser wiggles around all the time while he talks! He's PERFECT!
I actually think Roger's okay this time around, which is funny because I used to hate him.
I really wish Betty and Francine would hook up.
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[21 Nov 2009|05:25pm] |
hi, so this summer I interned at an ABA school and I posted a few times with my essay/rant-ish pieces of writing about aspects of the school that I thought were problematic. I wrote something else about it today so I thought it I would post it. It's sort of about the whole high-functioning/low-functioning divide invoked by curebies.
( They hate you. Yes, you. )
It's a bit vitriolic but at the same time, I think this stuff deserves vitriol.
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| Mad Men 1x01-1x03, i.e. I LOVE PETE BECAUSE HE IS ME |
[18 Nov 2009|08:50pm] |
"She kept looking at the maps and talking about all the places we were going to go...but we never did."--Pete's story about sex
AMAZING.
(Pete calls Don "buddy" and tries to shake hands with him.)
Don: Slow down, I don't want to wake up pregnant.
Pete: fuck you.
AND THE FINEST SCENE EVER:
(Peggy looks around awkwardly as Pete comes over to her in his giant neon suit and then smiles at him for a really long period of time.)
Pete: I'm back.
Peggy: I see that.
Pete: So...I should be on the list for the meeting.
Peggy: Oh! I just...didn't know when you were coming back.
Pete: Right... (in a weird jolly voice) Yeah, well, it's today, here I am! (creepy fake laugh)
Peggy: They're all in there already. You can go in.
(Pete shuffles around awkwardly and Peggy looks up at him with a repressed amused/happy expression on her face. I think. That's how I would feel, at least.)
Pete: Peggy--when I came over, that night, you know, before...
Peggy: I was there. (Awesome! I love that Peggy is only funny with Pete. This has actually more or less continued to be true, except she's funny with her mom and sister sometimes. The rest of the time she's an AWKWARD TURTLE.)
Pete: You know...I'm married now.
Peggy: I know.
Pete: So...
(AAAAWKWARD. Pete stands there looking like an 8-year-old. Peggy looks at him for a while.)
Peggy: (very slowly) Pete. I understand. It never happened.
People act like when Peggy had a crush on Pete she didn't understand what a loser he is but I absolutely don't think that's true, I think she has always found him unintentionally hilarious and she used to be in a position where she could afford to appreciate that, but she isn't anymore because she had to grow up and he didn't.
(Then Pete goes into the meeting and makes a joke and when everyone laughs, he looks like super awkwardly pleased with himself and rolls his little shoulders around. I love this show.)
AGGGH I CAN'T EVEN STAND S1 PETE WHENEVER HE TALKS I MUTE THE COMPUTER. LIKE WHEN HE TOLD DON HE MISSED HIM AND WANTED TO HAVE DINNER WITH HIM.
also: Don's train looks like an AmTrak not a MetroNorth. were trains different back then?
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[13 Nov 2009|05:50pm] |
to celebrate my birthday I have bought a £15 dying animal!
I really really didn't want something small but it was the only cheap guitar in the Wonderful Creepy Store where I had resolved to buy one (the guy who owns the store told me that he wanted to hold my hair in his hands all night long). Also, I realized that it is charmingly dead-sounding and creepy-looking. And anyway, maybe it's the strings.
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| sooo |
[09 Nov 2009|03:48pm] |
I started registering for next term surreptitiously in the back of my church history class and got first pick of everything because I'm not on campus!
Abnormal Psych--3 hours
Child Developmental Disorders--2 hours
Early Medieval Literature-4 hours
Latin Love Elegy--3 hours
Intro to Disability Studies--3 hours
Hopefully I'll be able to get into either the fiction workshop or the nonfiction workshop and drop the disability studies, which would leave me with 16 hours. I wasn't going to take a Latin class next term, but I didn't know it was going to be poetry, which I like a lot better than prose.
I obviously love disability studies but it's something I can and do devote myself to on my own time; and also, the class is called "'Unstable' Bodies: An Introduction to Dis/ability Studies." Number one, you're really pretentious, and number two, I'm disabled and it has nothing to do with my body so where does that leave me?
On the other hand it is probably another one of those classes that I could put on a job application. And I'm still not sure about the Latin. So it's probably better to actually go to both of them for a while during Add/Drop, and if everyone is making fingerquotes and being theoretical instead of talking about humans, I can end up taking Latin, and if they talk about humans, I can drop Latin instead.
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[01 Nov 2009|09:31pm] |
plans for tomorrow: get up at 7 and basically watch tv and noodle around of course, but finish sources for paper, print out at the library and be at the divinity school by 10 to return books to the library.
and have computer & read stuff for art history paper and possibly start writing paper & stuff.
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| SO |
[30 Oct 2009|05:17pm] |
A fun and fantastic fact is that if books are on reserve, you can only take them out for three hours, unless you take them out from the divinity school library on Friday at 4:45, and then they are due back on MONDAY MORNING.
But the library is also open on Saturday and I'll probably return them then because it makes me sad to think that if there's anyone in the world who procrastinates more than I do, they wouldn't be able to get the books before the paper is due (also Monday morning).
But in conclusion, I am awesome, basically. And this is going to be a FINE PAPER because I can stay up all night!
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| exams |
[27 Oct 2009|12:09pm] |
U02627 -
School of History, Classics and Archaeology - Latin 2A
Location: Appleton Tower Concourse
Date/Time: Thursday 10/12/2009, 09:30-11:30 (02:00)
DV0012 -
School of Divinity - Ecclesiastical History 2Ah: Gospel and Church in the Pluralistic Roman World
Location: Richard Verney Health Centre
Date/Time: Monday 14/12/2009, 09:30-11:30 (02:00)1
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[25 Oct 2009|02:25pm] |
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I love my mom.
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| more plans |
[21 Oct 2009|12:23pm] |
PSYC 490 - Seminar in Child Developmental Disorders/2-3SS
LATN 310 - Catullus, Horace, and the Roman Lyric Poem/3HU
CLAS 222 - Ovid in the Middle Ages/4HU (omg my FAVORITE English professor teaches this for some reason!! which means I don't have to take unnecessary ENGL classes just to bask in her awesomeness!!!!)
PSYC 214 - Abnormal Psychology/3NS
this is 2+3+4+4=13 hours which is not very many but presumably I will be in a writing class which will be...oh wait. If I get into a workshop I'll have to drop one of these I guess. Even though my FAVORITE Latin professor is here this year, I might drop the Latin and take my final Latin class next year, or possibly try to do a private reading.
For winter term John and I are writing a TV show for WPD and I'm going to read some Latin with my classics adviser, I think. I was going to read medieval stuff but I'm so into my church history class I think I might read Tertullian or something. He's the angry guy, right? And he talks about how on judgment day all the Romans who wore red to support particular sports teams will actually be red, because they'll be burning in hell? I think so. I get all the apologetics/intellectuals confused but I love them all (especially Justin Martyr, I wish he wrote in Latin).
I'm so excited for spring term. Actually, I'm thinking of applying for the translation workshop, and if I end up in that I wouldn't feel bad about dropping Latin because I'd still be doing Latin. Anyway. Glad I have all this figured out.
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[15 Oct 2009|03:10pm] |
A guy in my church history class was like, "I really liked your presentation!" (thumbs up) Oh, Christians. I had pretty much no speech ability in that class today.
I think my blog post was okay. I said Justin Martyr presented Christianity as the new improved version of classical philosophy. I thought he tried to avoid alienating his audience by saying that pagan beliefs were completely untrue, and that that was a clever tack because people are more open to adopting identities and beliefs if they seem somewhat familiar. It's just that for some reason when I was asked to introduce the discussion it took me a really long time to try to put together sentences describing what my blog post was about. Also, in the classroom over from ours people kept laughing and it was distracting. Whatever, I guess the post is what was important.
I love my church history class so much and I don't like any of my other classes that much. Latin is okay. My teacher is funny and I guess he's supposed to be brilliant, but it turns out you can be brilliant without being a good teacher. He called on this kid who obviously hadn't done the translation because every time a new word came up the kid would say "oh, I had trouble figuring out how to translate this word" but the professor never caught him because even though he has published a translation of this text, which he reads out loud to us all the time, he doesn't remember what all the words mean and has to look them up himself half the time. Hilarious.
My art history professor is American and tries to ingratiate herself by making jokes about sex and saying how dumb it is to be religious. This is Europe, but still, it's a class of 200 so I assume someone or other believes in God or is even perish the thought Christian. The professor says things like, "When I was a little girl, I thought that if I went to heaven, I would get to be with my grandmother and my cat, and we would all have as much ice cream as we wanted. But it turns out actually, you just sit around the throne of Jesus and say 'Holy, holy, holy, Lord Almighty, who was, and who is, and who is to come.' I was really disappointed."
She got replaced by a new lecturer this week though, because we moved to a new area. Hooray! I hate professors who can't be entertaining just by being interested in the subject. Even the most awkward professor, like my Latin professor, is entertaining because he really cares.
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[11 Oct 2009|09:51pm] |
I started going to a church for gay and trans people. It's the only un-scary church I've ever gone to. We had to write a Psalm of Lamentation. Mine goes like this:
Why does everyone have to think it's stupid to believe in you & make me feel like I'm stupid and crazy for believing?
If this works on me, does it mean You aren't real?
Why does church have to have so many rules that make me nervous?
It's true that everything is beautiful and hits me hard in the eyes.
I wish more people loved me.
I wish I wasn't as scared.
I wish I could make myself do things.
I love You.
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[03 Oct 2009|03:24pm] |
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I just wondered--are there any girls in the "I Am Autism" video? Because I only remember one, and that seems weird. It's supposed to be like 10-25%, right?
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